I admit, there’s not much going on in my life. I am, most of the time, a very boring woman. I go to class, I go to work, I come home, and I relax. There’s normally not much variation in my routine thanks to a lot of factors. At the beginning of 2011, I made a promise to myself though that I would do more. Be more social. Be more kinkster. Be more just out there. Hell, I’m not going to find playmates or romantic interests if I’m locked in my apartment by 5pm and in bed by 8pm every night. Okay, well I might, but the chances are extremely unlikely.
That being said, I’ve made a conscious effort to get back into the Chicago kink scene and be more social, both with my law school friends and my kink friends. In the last few weeks I’ve made really good progress and started reconnecting with important people along with meeting new people.
Last Monday I started by putting a personal ad up on Fetlife.com. I guess you could say that I am looking to get back into the dating scene too. But you’re saying, “Isabel, what about your chastity vow/dating ban?” I think the biggest revelation I’ve had in the last few weeks is that I feel like my vow has come to it’s natural end. I’ve learned a lot about myself; I’ve learned to be happy and love myself. I’ve learned that I deserve better than what I was giving and affording myself. Most importantly, I’ve learned not to compromise on things that I consider extremely important. Maybe it’s the loneliness talking, but I would like to find someone now. Hell, I’d like to find someones. My ad mainly focused on the search in Chicago for individuals or couples I could be friends with and ultimately be involved romantically or play-wise with. So far I’ve received a ton of responses, some good and some bad. Some hilariously bad in fact. Maybe some day I’ll post some of the most hilariously bad messages I receive on Fetlife. Through all the messages and all the laughter, there have been some gems that have emerged. We’re in the first stages of getting to know each other. Mainly still talking. I have a tentative dinner/coffee date scheduled for this upcoming Sunday with someone who seems promising. We shall see. I don’t necessarily need or want to find the love of my life right now, but I think I’d like to make friends that share my views on kink. Moreover I’d like to meet some people I feel comfortable indulging in play and/or sex with without the worry that things are going to fall apart afterward. I’m definitely missing that release.
Last Tuesday I also signed up to attend SINSations in Leather, a Chicago-based kink convention and all-together good time. For the longest time I’ve been really interested in attending a convention or large gathering but for whatever reason, plans have never materialized. Usually I have conflicts with school, work or family. The biggest stumbling block has always been price as well. After being alerted to a Valentine’s weekend special I decided to finally take the plunge and sign up. I’m hoping to meet a lot of cool people, enjoy and learn at some interesting classes, and most importantly show off and partake in damn good play times. I’ve heard wild stories of these conventions and am definitely interested in coming away with some of my own. I’ll be there with bells on, so to speak. Hell, I may even bring my tweezer-style clamps with bells on the end! My suitcase will get packed with toys, gear, fetish wear and shoes. I’ll also be bringing a healthy supply of business cards to promote my blog in any way I can. If you’re interested in going, I suggest you sign up soon. Space is limited and you can be guaranteed of a good time. Plus you’ll get to see me there!
In addition to all of this, I’m also being more social with school friends. As one person said to me on Saturday night at an 80’s prom-themed party, “Holy crap! You’re socializing again! Twice! In the same week! Hell, twice in the same year!” Yeah, I know. I’m a flake when it comes to hanging out with friends who share a lot of common interests. Well, at least a lot of common school interests. I highly doubt some of these people are doing what I’m doing on the weekends. Of course you never know considering how undercover I am myself. There may be other kinksters among my classmates and I may not know it.
Overall, I’m just trying to savor the last few months I have of freedom before graduation and subsequent studying for the bar exam. There’s under 100 days until I graduate from what is my 19th year of school in a row. Do I feel under pressure to fit in everything before I leave? Yes, I do. I want to have the memories I haven’t made yet so I’m going out of my way to do all this.
So if I’m slow, absent or generally not posting a lot, you will know why. I have life to live! I have experiences to enjoy! I have kinky times to partake in. Most importantly, I want to be the best undercover kinskter I can be and I can’t be undercover if I’m always hiding in my apartment.