Category Archives: bondage

Long Time, No Blog

So it’s been awhile since I’ve been here, I know. I could give you some bullshit excuse why I haven’t been around more (*cough*bar exam*cough*) but besides that doozie of an excuse, August has pretty much been the month from hell for me so far.

Stress has been majorly kicking my ass lately. Admittedly 90% of the year I do not have a very stressful job. It’s quiet and there’s not much work involved in it. I sit at a desk and answer calls. I take rent money and try to collect rent when people are delinquent in paying. That 10% of the year that is stressful though is just an absolute 100% nightmare. When everybody is moving in and out of apartments, I get constant and continual bitching from everybody on all sides. The tenants bitch when things aren’t done; maintenance bitches that we push them too hard and they don’t have time to do everything. My boss and co-worker bitches that people are too whiny (because having all the toilets in the apartment not working is whining?) Meanwhile, I answer calls and get to deal with everybody on all sides.

But all that is beside the point. I also haven’t blogged a lot because I just don’t feel I have anything interesting to say. I haven’t done anything kinky, sexy or otherwise fetish-oriented in a very long time. I think that’s what’s been getting me the most lately. I have no outlet for these thoughts and desires. Sure, I get them like normal and get them with a vengeance sometimes. I express them to someone who listens and wants to work through them with me, but he is across the country and only can do so much for me.

That brings me to my biggest stumbling point lately. I am desperately lonely. When I went on my chastity vow last October, I thought I would go a couple months tops before it “felt right” again. Maybe at the worst I’d go six months. Actually I felt that if I went six months, I would be in really good shape and would have broken my tendency to engage in the destructive behaviors that led to me taking my vow in the first place. I couldn’t have guessed last October that I’d now be going into September of 2011 still without sex or even cuddling. Sure, I’ve played once (SINSations in Leather in April) but one play session does not make for a fulfilling kink life. Ideally, it should be something more regular.

I find myself wondering more and more lately if I’m just going to be alone. It seems like there are so many people out there supporting me, telling me they would love one change to “be with” me, or anything similar. Despite all this, I come home every night from an exhausting job to an apartment filled with stuffed animals for companions. I can’t say I’ve cooked myself a full meal in weeks, if not months. Why go through the effort of cooking a full meal if it’s just going to be me eating it?

In general though, I’m feeling very uninspired. I have all these things I want to do theoretically, but I end up looking into them and not really caring. I want to feel motivated again. I’ve talked before how I would like to get into modeling of some sort and I am still very much so interested in that. Six months ago I had several photographers more than willing to shoot me and the only things standing in the way of that was scheduling and distance. Those people seem to have disappeared into the woodwork now and I’m left with a desire but no photographer.

It seems like my drive to review products is starting to wane too. Everything is alike. How can I make reviews stand out and seem interesting? There are so few products in the sphere of sex and bondage toys that I would be willing to review. I won’t compromise on quality materials and absolutely refuse to use body unsafe materials. Plus it seems like no fetish wear or bondage gear manufacturer or retailer is willing to do any kind of review system. It’s pretty frustrating to find things to review.

So what should I do? I really don’t know. I’m trying to figure out what my next move is going to be. There’s so many things I want to do. So many mountains I want to climb and adventurers to have. It’s just a matter of seeing what comes up and what I’m willing to do. I’m spreading my wings now that school is over, but so much is up in the air right now that I’m still feeling pretty lost right now. Until I have results from the bar exam, I have no idea what to do next in my life.

Review: Fetish Fantasy Series Extreme Hogtie Kit

Oh man. Oh oh man. There has been few things brewing in the back of my mind longer than being restrained in some form or fashion. Whether with rope or restraints, it’s pretty much been there as long as I can remember. Quite frankly I think my first sexual thoughts involved being restrained some way and finding sexual pleasure in that.

When I got my hands on the Extreme Hogtie Set, part of the Fetish Fantasy Series by Pipedream Products, I was psyched. Finally! Full immobilization and all the kinky thoughts that went along with that for me! Oh yes, please. Sign me up. Alas, I found myself … underwhelmed by the products when I opened the box.

Included with this kit is: (2) neoprene ankle cuffs, (2) neoprene wrist cuffs, (1) “heavy duty” metal hogtie center piece and (1) free satin love mask. The actual restraints and connector are packaged in one bag and the free mask is packaged in another within the box you receive. When you first unseal the plastic baggies, the overwhelming scent of what I can only describe as “ICK!” greets your nose. My best guess is that it’s the neoprene foam that each restraint is made from. That gross plasticy, rubber smell. Not exactly what I call the best impression a product can make.

Center hogtie ring

 The center hogtie ring that connects all the cuffs is what I first examined. The metal ring seems stable and sturdy enough. No complaints there. There are four smaller rings connected to the larger center ring by way of black mesh straps and two rivets on each strap. I pulled as hard as I could and the black mesh stretched, but didn’t come apart. Despite this, I question its ability to withstand someone very strong pulling on all sides. From that alone I determined this is definitely what the more bondage-gear inclined would call a “beginner set.” If you pull hard enough, I suspect the mesh would come away from the rivets holding the folded over mesh together. Additionally, the smaller rings are not solid rings and I worry about pressure on those as well. Sure it would take someone very strong to pull the ring apart, but it wouldn’t be unheard of.

The cuffs next concerned me. As someone who has a very tiny wrist (I often have to take links out of bracelets or watches) I was worried that they wouldn’t fit me. The wrist cuffs are 10 inches long and after a little maneuvering fit me. The neoprene had to be doubled up and the hook and loop tape had extra hanging over. That being said, the neoprene does make these fairly comfortable, though not exactly what I would call stylish. The ankle cuffs are of similar make, though slightly wider (the wrist cuffs just over 2 inches and the ankle cuffs just over 2 1/2 inches.) The ankle cuffs are also longer. They measure 11 3/4 inches in length compared to the wrist cuffs’ 10 inches. These also fit comfortably on my ankle, but like the wrist cuffs I had to double over the neoprene to make them small enough. 

Closeup of the hardware on the cuffs

My biggest gripe with these cuffs is the hardware on them. It just looks flimsy and cheap. Hell, the rings that are attached to both the cuffs and clips to the center hogtie ring are split rings, like you’d put your car and house keys on. This is probably how the actual connector pieces were attached to them. The clip connector’s swiveling base is wide and the ring it’s connected to is very narrow. This leads to the actual connector sliding around a lot on the ring and while this might be useful in positioning and comfort of the user, to me it just seems like they took a stock piece of hardware and threw it on the cuffs. The metal on these is fairly thin for good cuff standards and also contributes to their flimsy and cheap look.

These cuffs look very beginner and newbie. Almost cheap. If you show up to a professional fetish club with these, you’d be shamed out of there. Or at least I’d be embarrassed if I showed up with these on my body or for use. They may be good for the occasional user at home, one who is curious about restraints and wants something simple and inexpensive, but outside of that I really can’t think anybody seriously into bondage would use these. They just seem …. not very well executed to me. The idea was there and it seems like the manufacturers took a whole bunch of stock hardware and materials laying around the production facility and threw them together into this set.

And this free mask that is included with this set? Oh dear jeebus, just throw it out before you even take it out. Don’t bother with it. The material reminds me of a pool cover. Crinkly and loud. It couldn’t have cost them more than five or ten cents to make this thing and it certainly shows. If you want a mask and don’t want to buy it from a sex toy seller, just go to your local mass market retailer and buy a sleep mask. While not as “bondage”-y, it will probably be more comfortable, smell better and last longer.

Of all the negatives to this set, do I have anything positive to say? After really searching deep for something I found it – the girl on the front of the box is cute. I really like her eye makeup and corset. And quite frankly? That’s kind of sad that’s the only positive thing I could find.

You want a hogtie set? You can find so many more out there that are quality sets than the Extreme Hogtie Kit, part of the Fetish Fantasy Series by Pipedream Products.

Review: Heart 2 Heart cuffs from Babeland.com

I’m thrilled for the opportunity to be reviewing for Babeland.com, one of the best and most sex-positive toy retailers out there. They do great things for the community and their stores are fantastic. I highly recommend you check out Babeland’s website or their retail stores for some of the best products and information out there.

I’m even more thrilled that the first product I am reviewing from Babeland is the Heart 2 Heart cuffs. I’ve never before had a set of real leather bondage cuffs and when I saw these, I simply squealed for joy. There is nothing like the smell of leather and feel of the material against your skin. As someone who obviously considers myself fairly kinky compared to mainstream sex, the fact these are my first leather cuffs is actually somewhat surprising even to me. I simply couldn’t find a set before these I liked at a reasonable price in a genuine material.

Speaking of the material, the leather here is very nice. It’s supple while still having some oomph to it. When I slapped these babies on my wrist I couldn’t help but get excited at the feel of leather against my skin. Smelling that great leather smell turned me on even more. The width on the black leather portion of the cuff is pretty wide, a little under 2 1/4 inches. I have a fairly dainty wrist so I was concerned they would look clunky on my wrists, but fear not. They looked spectacular. See?

 The exterior of the cuff has a lovely red strip of leather down the center with all the connecting hardware. Because my wrist is so small, I found it a little cumbersome to pull the strap tight enough to get the tongue through the hole. I think as the leather softens though this will become less of a problem. Certainly as these cuffs get more use as well.

The red leather piece is riveted to the black piece with five sets of two rivets. They are flat on top and bottom and do not irritate the skin at all. This was definitely a plus. Cuffs are no fun to be in when they are uncomfortable or irritating to the skin.

I found the metal parts of the connectors to be a bit on the flimsy side. These are by no means cuffs meant for hard play. They don’t lock and I could see with rougher play things could get bent out of shape somehow. That being said, these cuffs aren’t sold or marketed for rougher bondage play so I didn’t expect them to be able to withstand that kind of use. 

These cuffs are very adjustable size wise given that there are seven different holes you can change the size of the cuffs to. I believe they’d accommodate someone with a very wide wrist all the way down to someone with a wrist smaller than mine. They’d probably even be good for ankle cuffs as long as you have slender ankles. I tried them on my ankles and while they didn’t fit, they came super close. Granted, I also have slightly chunkier ankles (but no cankles for me I swear!)

Overall I believe that for $35, the Heart 2 Heart cuffs are worth the investment as long as you know you’re not getting these for situations where you’d want to lock them or use them in more intense bondage play. The leather is supple and smells amazing. They are highly adjustable and generally constructed from quality materials that will withstand light to moderate bondage players. You can find them at Babeland’s online store and select retail locations.