I have people ask me all the time: “What’s your favorite [insert category of sex toys]?” Over the years I’ve tried so many it would make most people’s heads spin. Hell, if you look at which toys are in my collection, the number really is quite staggering. I didn’t even realize I’d tried that many until I actually sat down and listed them all.
Sex toys come and go but I find myself gravitating back to the tried and true ones. These are the toys that will forever hold a dear place in my heart and bedside drawer.
Pure Wand by nJoy
If I could write an ode to one toy and one toy alone, it would be the Pure Wand. For a long time before I wrangled up the funds for one, it had been spoken of with high esteem by sex toy reviewers and users alike. “It’s fabulous! You won’t regret it!” they all said. I always replied with a skeptical look and mindset. There really couldn’t be one single dildo that did everything for me, could there? I mean, after all … it’s huge! It weighs in at around three pounds of solid stainless steel. I could use this thing as a personal defense tool, for god’s sakes.
The weight is what makes it so totally delicious and beyond reproach. I swear to you that from the very first time I used the Pure Wand, I was hooked. It has brought me more orgasms than all my other toys combined. Hands down. The small end is perfect for targeting the g-spot. That tiny end almost acts like a magnet. WHAM! G-spot stimulation! The larger end is great for all over, cervix-pounding thrusts. The two ends are perfectly counter balanced and this provides an ease of use that you would otherwise think would be lacking in such a hulking piece of beauty. The trick to using the half moon shape is to rock it in and follow the natural curve of the dildo.
It’s incredibly cleanable, with no cracks or crevices that could collect gross germs or gunk. Use antibacterial soap, boil it or put it in the dishwasher. It comes in it’s own crown jewels-like case, nestled in a bed of pink satin.
Read my full review of the nJoy Pure Wand here
Magnum by Fun Factory
Okay, so maybe stainless steel isn’t your thing. No problemo. My other favorite dildo is by far the Magnum dildo by Fun Factory. It’s swirly, it’s silicone, it’s firm and it’s got a fantastic girth! Is that enough for you?
Magnum is probably top most dildo on my dildo pile other than the Pure Wand. Sometimes, you just want thickness inside you! That’s what Magnum offers and more. What I like most about this dildo is that it’s definitely got some heft to it (I sense a theme!) There is nothing wimpy about this dildo. It’s not slender and it’s not for the faint of heart. This makes it a win in my book. Not to mention that it is harness-compatible! The flared base makes it great for anal use, though admittedly you’d have to be a pretty intense anal player to get the whole shaft of this beast into your bum. Owie.
The shape is just asexual enough not to freak me out and just detailed enough in the right places to provide stimulation where my body craves it. From all the dildos I’ve tried, used and no longer use, I’ve noticed that I like curvy dildos. Some have the extreme curve of the Pure Wand and some have the more gentle curve of the Magnum. The broad head of the Magnum is great at stimulating the whole g-spot area while staying away from sharp, cervix-puncturing pokes.
Once again, you can clean the Magnum in all the same ways you can clean the Pure Wand, a must for my germaphobic self.
Read my full review of the Magnum by Fun Factory here
Mimi by Je Joue (pink) and/or Siri by Lelo (purple)
I tried my best to decide which one of these I liked more, but I simply couldn’t pick. It’s like asking me to decide among my pairs of shoes which I like the best. It simply can’t be decided. They both have their pros and cons and quite frankly, I wish that they would just combine already! Make sweet, cute, powerful, easily rechargeable and waterproof little love babies.
They’re both perfect in their own way. The Mimi is waterproof all over. I keep Mimi in my shower for a quick waterproof pick me up in the morning. It’s broad, flat head is great for clitoral vibrations. It has a billion different vibration patters, but I’ll be honest and say I really dislike vibration patterns. I prefer constant vibration to a pattern any day. Same goes for the Siri in terms of patterns. I know they’re there if I ever want to try them out, but I sure as hell don’t use them on a day to day basis.
Siri’s pointier head is great for super targeted vibrations and on the whole I would say I use Siri more than Mimi, but Mimi is clearly better for wet encounters because Siri’s buttons are the weak point in it’s chain. The charging port is at the back of the hard plastic part of the handle and the plug in is easily accessed by water and/or lube. Eeek! Mimi charges by magic … or as Je Joue says “a magnetic clip” that just magically holds onto the little electrodes that also double as on/off buttons at the non-business end.
Both have tips that are silicone and cleanable, but Mimi is covered all over (with the exception of the very end with those buttons). I’m gentle with when I clean these and only clean with soap and water.
One thing you may notice is that I don’t have a stick vibrator or traditional style vibrator listed here. Why? Because I just don’t have a use for them. My vagina likes penetration, not vibration. My clitoris is the one who likes vibration, so why have all the extra bulk? It’s not necessary. I stick with tiny, discrete and out of the way vibrators.
Small Clear Plug by Crystal Delights
I have said it before and I will say it again until I’m hoarse in the face. The single best plug I’ve ever used in my entire life is the Small Clear Plug by Crystal Delights. End of story. There simply isn’t another plug or anal toy even like this plug. If there isn’t one of these in your toy collection if you are into anal, then you should drop everything and get one of these now. Hell, you should have had one of these since the day they came on the market.
Why am I so in love with this plug? It has absolutely everything I have ever wanted in a plug and more. It sparkles like CRAZY. I like everything sparkly and there is nothing that sparkles like a huge Swarovski crystal in your ass. People have told me it looks like a freaking flashlight shining out of my bum. It is just that sparkly. Doesn’t every girl want something sparkly in her life? Tiffany, Cartier, Harry Winston. Pffft. They have nothing on these things. Forget putting a diamond on my finger; put a diamond in my butt!
This plug has unparalleled comfort. I’ve worn it for upwards of five to six hours and could have easily worn it for much longer. Because it’s glass it does have a bit of a weight to it, but actually it’s a pleasant weight. I find that when I’m wearing it, I’m more aware of my sensuality. I feel owned and dominated even if I’m the one doing the dominating. There is something about anal that puts me in the most delicious headspace and this plug is number one in doing it for me.
I could go on and on for hours and days about how amazing all of the Crystal Delights toys are (helloooooo … they have TAILS!) but this is the flagship in the line, in my mind. When Crystal Delights first came out they had two sizes – large and small. The large plug has a longer neck and looked uncomfortable to me. I’m so glad I went with the small and thus the shorter necked plug. It simply does everything for me.
You simply won’t know how amazing these toys really are until you try them. That’s all there is.
Read my full review of the Small Clear Plug by Crystal Delights here
Natural Organics by Sliquid
Why do I have lube here? Because it’s lube! Everybody needs lube. Our bodies are not natural lubricant producers all the time. If you do any anal play at all and are even halfway concerned about your butt’s health, you must use lubricant. The ass doesn’t produce any natural lubricant on its own in the way a vagina does. No lube equals friction. Friction equals tearing. “Tearing” and “asshole” are two words that should never, ever go together.
There are a million and one lubricants on the market and a million and one chemicals that manufacturers put in those lubricants. Some are more harmful to your body than others. Sliquid is an American company making super body-safe and organic lubricants that are bar none my favorite ones. I’ve tried tons and found that some dry out, some get sticky, and some … well, I don’t like to speak of some.
Sliquid makes a ton of different varieties, some water based and some silicone based. Some have flavors and some have no flavors. Some are warming and some are cooling. I like the plain old basic Natural Organics version that is water-based. It works with any toy material and any condom material. This lube has just ten ingredients and five of those are certified organic. My body likes those odds.
There are so many other lubricants out there that claim to be body-safe and non toxic. This lube actually is both of those things. Why aren’t you using it already?
So there you have it. Six simple products that have changed my life. I couldn’t live without them and I sure as hell never want to be without them if I’m ever stuck on a desert island. We’ll just imagine the whole electricity issue isn’t an issue at all. Need a new toy in your life? Get one of these. Need a toy that will last you a lifetime and will get you hooked? Get one of these.
I know my life wouldn’t be the same without them!